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RWBY Riffs Returns

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20141031

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RWBY Riffs Returns




Ruby: -currently in a Dracula costume- Happy Halloween everyone.


Yang: -currently dressed like the Bride of Frankenstein- Are you boils and ghouls ready for an awesome Halloween?

Weiss: -currently wrapped in bandages- Why am I the mummy again?

Blake: -currently in a ridiculous werewolf costume- Cause we decided to go with a universal horror theme; and you didn't like the Carmilla costume...

Weiss: There was no Carmilla costume! It was a bikini with "Carmilla" written on it. And a pair of vampire fangs! I refuse to wear something so undignified! -bandage falls in front of her face-

Yang: So, is anyone ready to read the most TERRIFYINGLY BAD STORY YET?

Weiss: Can't be worse than the last one.

Yang: Oh ye of little faith.

Ruby: Bring it on! Whatever it is, we can take it!


Weiss Dies, Blake Dies, Yang Dies, Everyone Dies!






Ruby: Wut.

Weiss: Why would someone write a fanfic about all of us dying?

Blake: Someone must have it out for us.

Ruby: But what would they have against us? We're so loveable...-looks at Weiss- Most of us are so loveable!

Weiss: Hey!

By: The Loneliest Of All

Except Jaune and Ruby of course. #OTP #LOL #Hashtag
Rated: Fiction M - English - Horror/Humor - Ruby Rose, OC, Jaune Arc - Words: 928 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 5 - Published: Sep 26 - Status: Complete - id: 10718298 

 
Yang: Looks like whoever it is has a soft spot for Ruby.

Ruby: Why is it always me they're writing about?

It was a normal day so far, but Ruby had a feeling that something bad was going to happen, she couldn't tell what though. She was carrying a package that recently arrived in the mail for her team, sender unknown, and while some would find that suspicious she was too naive. She happily trotted into her team's dorm. "Heya Weiss! What's going on?" The heiress waved at her with a smile on her face.

"Just doing some homework, which you should be doing as well!" Her smile turned into glare.

"Hehe, I was just getting the mail, calm down Weiss. I'll get right on it." Weiss noticed the square shaped package that Ruby was holding.

"What's that?"

"I don't know, it's for us though."

"Well let's open it up! It could be important!" Ruby pulled out Crescent Rose and very gently cut the tape with it's blade. Weiss facepalmed. "You could have just used scissors like a normal person."

"Oh. Whatever, let's see what in here!" She opened it up to find a tiny black box, 'DO NOT OPEN' written in bold red lettering. "Well that's kind of stupid, of course I'm going to open it!" Ruby recklessly threw the top up. Suddenly, the room began to shake.

"I don't think you should have opened it!" Weiss cried! A dark purple energy enveloped Ruby, she cackled wickedly. "Ruby?" Ruby, now glowing a fiendish purple, looked at Weiss evilly. She giggled sweetly and raised Crescent Rose to strike. In an instance, Weiss' head was rolling around on the floor.

"Ruby!? What did you do!?" Yang walked in, shocked at what she just witness her sweet innocent little sister just do.

"Oh, hi sis! I killed Weiss!" She giggled sweetly once again. "You're next!" Before Yang could react, she sliced her in half, blood sprayed everywhere, and her entrails spilled out on the floor. "Oh my, you should clean up after yourself Yang, this room is messy!" She laughed and skipped out the door. "I wonder what Cardin's up to?"





Blake was stunned, she had just witnessed Ruby slice Cardin up into tiny little pieces. "Ruby, what!?" Ruby snapped her attention to Blake, and appeared behind her nearly instantly.

"Hiya, Kitty Cat, I've been looking everywhere for you! You look kind of sick, I'm sorry to say it, but it looks like we have to put you down!" She said happily, she snapped her neck and pulled it off of her body, her spinal cord coming with it. "Fatality!" She exclaimed in a rough voice.





"Pyrrha, look out!" Nora shouted. Pyrrha ducked to avoid the blade of Crescent Rose. "Ruby, you have to stop this, have you gone insane!?"

"Aw, thank you for noticing Nora!" Jaune grunted as he swung his blade at Ruby's arm, trying his best to disarm her. "Nuh uh uh, bad Jaune!" She bashed him away with the shaft of her scythe. She turned and jumped in the air, flipping over Pyrrha and decapitating her.

"Pyrrha!" Jaune gritted his teeth, and watched in horror as Ruby easily killed Nora and Ren.

"No, dammit, no!" Ruby walked up to him, the sheer amount of joy she was radiating was disturbing, like she took some sort of sick satisfaction in killing her friends. But the most disturbing thing, is that she did.

"Hey Jaune!" He wiped away the tears from his eyes and looked up at her. She looked exactly like she did when they first met, the purple glow that surrounded her was completely gone. He backed away from her in fear.

"Ruby? Why… Why did you do it?" He asked.

"I believe I can answer that question." They were teleported to purgatory, an endless white void was all they could see for miles. A lone figure walked up to them.

"Who are you?" They both asked in unison. It seemed Ruby had completely came back to her senses.

"I… My children, am the author. Or as some call me, God." Their eyes widened.

"G-God!?"

"Yes, Jaune, God. Now shut up. I am the reason that Ruby killed everyone, it was my will that it be done. Because I'm a sick bastard who enjoys homicide and genocide. Twas I who sent Ruby that package, and twas I that made her open it." Ruby looked at me with confusion.

"But why?" She asked.

"Because I can." I replied.

"No, I mean, wouldn't it have been easier just to make me kill everyone. Instead you sent a fucking package and came up with this weird black magic shit? And now we're doing this whole weird thing? Honestly, it all seems kind of pointless, don't you think."

"...How about you shut up…"

"And why did you leave Jaune alive?" I walked up to them and brought them into a hug.

"That's because you two are my OTP. Now I came down here to answer Jaune's question, and since I did that, adios bitches." I teleported away and rebuilt the world around them, they were alone, everyone in the world was gone.

"Shit, what an asshole." Jaune said.

"Yeah. Well, since we're alone… Wanna fuck?"

"Why not." And so they got it on while I watched. Because I'm the author and I can do anything I want and there's nothing you can do about it!





Author's Notes: This is a joke, don't take this seriously. And honestly, what were you expecting?




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