The Owl Game: RP Edition

For those of you who don't know, which is all of you, this game is about sending each other letters. It's from a Harry Potter site, hence the owls. Here's an example: http://archiveofourown.org/works/35895

So, the format is

Spoiler:

(no spoilers in the actual posts plz)

Messages can be intercepted, but will always end up with the designated receiver.

I'm going for the feel in that there above fanfiction, but it has been done elsewhere, as you may have seen.

NOTE: THIS IS HOGWARTS RP, NOT US OR POTTERVERSE. SEPERATE ONES WILL BE MADE

Vanessa,

I think some weirdo is out to get me. I got a...really disturbing letter in the mail. Said something about people I cared about. Creeped me out. So... can I crawl into your bed for protection tonight?

Erika.

To, Erika

This is the fifth time you have written me about a 'disturbing letter'. I swear, if I find you in my bed tonight, I will feed you to the Thestrals.

From, Vanessa

Erika,

I recently got a letter from some wizard in some African country sayin' he had a hundred million galleons for me. Was that you playing a prank on me, cause if it was, ya best watch out.

Benjamin.

Vanessa,

I really am getting disturbing letters. And they keep burning up after I read them, I swear.

Erika

--

Ben,

Is he claiming to be a Nigerian prince? Cause I got that letter too.

Erika

--

Erika,

Flee Hogwarts before the purge of the purebloods begins. Stay in Hogwarts, however, and I will have to kill you.

Anonymous

--

Dearest Anonymous,

I find your warnings of impending doom to be both disturbing, and lacking the intention of backing them up. I kindly ask that you stop writing me; or I shall have to involve the police. So fuck off asshole.

Love: Erika.

Erika

Sorry about the letters. They were supposed to go to the first years. Rental owls never get anything right...

Micah

Micah,

Those are some strange things to write to first years. Particularly the bit in the first letter about the "tentacle monster in a business suit" that's apparently going to eat me if I don't leave. While I'm all for scaring first years; I think traumatizing them with threatening letters is taking it a bit far. I assume you also wrote the most recent one saying that the purebloods were gonna die? Good job making the handwriting look different. don't worry, I'm not in a payback mood today.

Erika

--

Vanessa,

Micah is the one writing the letters. Care to join me for some righteous vengeance? By which I mean we come up with the prank of the century and utterly destroy her with it.

Erika

Erika

It's all in good fun. I don't write them about anything that could actually happen to them here.

I didn't write anything about purebloods. Some of them are annoying but that aren't that annoying.

Micah

Micah,

So there's still some other idiot writing letters to me? Wonderful. Oh well, if they try anything I can just kick their ass.

Erika

Erika

Looks like it. If you find out who it is I can scare their pants off for you if you want. To make up for the mis-addressed notes and all that.

Micah

---

My Dearest Violet,

Your smile glows like the summer sun. Your eyes are twin pools of liquid shyness. Your hair is as soft as an owl's butt. I'll buy you a butter beer if you play lookout while I break into the potions supply closet.

Micah

To Erika,

Micah has a weird sense of humor, so it doesn't really surprise me that she was writing them. I'm all in for the vengence, though.

From, Vanessa

Erika,

Enclosed is a charm good for taking ONE PAIR OF YOUR PANTIES.

It's rather cold today, isn't it?

Jack

Micah,

Thanks for the offer, but I have plans of my own if I ever find out who it is. Plans that involve the room of requirement and ginger beer.

Erika.

--

Vanessa,

Good. Meet me near the astronomy tower with a slingshot, a broom, and diarretic potion.

Erika

--

Jack,

Enclosed is a charm that will cause your palms to be covered in hair. I'd have done something more elaborate; but I'm already working on one ridiculously elaborate vengeance plan at the moment.

Batman,

I sold your panties to some seventh year snake. She seemed pretty eager.

Your stupid spell made me break three razors. As such, I have taken the liberty to have more of your underwear removed from your room.

King Gryffindor

p.s. Really is kind of chilly, don't you think?

Jack,

Since I heard some Gryffindors call me a 'sissy' compared to you, I decided to prove them otherwise. This letter's envelope, as I'm sure you've noticed, is charmed to have much more space than it appears. Inside are twenty-seven(27) blast-ended skrewts. Enjoy.

Benjamin.

Jack,

I anticipated this. That hair on your hands is going to spread every time you steal a pair of my panties. I put a hex on them designed to specifically interact with the one on your hands. I will remove the hex completely if my panties are returned to me.

Erika.

PS, it's quite itchy over there, isn't it?

Darling Jack,

I have watched you from afar for some time. The very sight of your radiant head takes my breath away. You are poetry in motion - Graceful as a centaur, fierce as a phoenix.

Adoringly,
Your Reflection

Gigantor

How the hell did you fit 27 Blast Ended Skrewts into one envelope? I would have liked to return the favour with a Nundu, but unfortunately I lost the order form, along with several toes.

Therefore, as a symbol of gratitude, I am going to curse your teeth out and have them made into jewelry for you next time I see you.

Jack
_________

Batty,

As the aforementioned undergarments are no longer my property, I cannot return them. I would like you to release the hex, as I have run out of razors and had to resort to cutting charms. As you can probably understand, this is unsafe for my genitalia.

Forest Grump
______

Reflection,

I'm out of your league. Stop following me.

Jack

Jack Dearest,

I cannot help my love for you any more than you can cease to be such a pinnacle of wizardly perfection. I am watching you. Always watching.

Love,
Your diligent admirer

Diligent admirer,

I certainly hope you aren't.

Disturbed

Jack,

I might be persuaded to remove the hex if you are willing to be involved in a prank to end all pranks against a certain metamorphamagus. If not, then I'm sure you can just explain to Madam Pomphrey that you got yourself hexed because you were stealing panties from a girl. I'm sure she'll understand.

sincerly, The Caped Crusader.

Erika,

I don't know why it's happening, but your underwear has started appearing under my pillow while I sleep. If you're doing this, I'm going to hex your rear end to the back of your head. Hope your spine is flexible.

Also, I've got the stuff.

Sincerely, Vanessa

Batsy,

Your attempts at blackmailing me are laughable. I have alibis. Further attempts to force me to do your bidding will result in loss of bras.

This being said, I will assist you depending on the worthiness of the prank.

Jack

p.s She bought them, I didn't put them under her pillow.

Jack,

She'd probably need the panties to identify the hex, so good luck explaining that. As for the prank, I'd rather tell you in person.

Erika

--

Vanessa,

That is most definately Jack's doing. If it's not too much trouble, I would like those back. One question though: How is it that you recognize that it's my underwear? Is there something you should be telling me?

Thanks for procuring the items. Believe it or not, I have managed to gain help from Peeves in this endeavor. I told him a small part of it and he seemed honored to be involved. I've also made arrangements for Jack to be hit by the prank as well; and at the same time getting him to help out with it.

Erika

--

Dumbass,

Hell. No.

Jack the Great.

Jack,

Oh well; though you would have been helpful, your presence is not required for the prank to be successful.

Erika

Jackie-Wackie,

I will always be watching. I drink your tears in your sleep. They taste of sweet bitterness and rage. It is a very refreshing taste. I hope to taste more of you one day.

Lovingly Watching,
Your Admirer

Erika,

Don't get all creepy on me. You're the only person I know that wears neon-colored underwear.

Also, you know way too many spells for concealing things. It's quite suspicious.

Vanessa

Erika,

Kay thanks bye.

Jack
_____

Creepy stalker,

Um, what?

Jack the Great

Jack,

It has come to my attention that you've gotten yourself into a rather...hairy situation. I can take it off your hands for you, for the right price. Nothing you wouldn't get around to doing anyway, I'm sure.

Micah

---

Vi,

Please get back to me re: butter beer soon. I'm running on a tight timetable here and I can't stall forever.

Micah